Merry Christmas

So yeah
Its a little late but I don't really care.
My Christmas sucked hairy monkey balls.
I sat in my room and screamed at my mom because she wouldn't shut her fucking face.
Thats kind of the way it's been since like, two months ago.

Work is a pain in my arse, considering my manager doesn't know what she's doing.
I don't really talk to any of my friends.
And my room smells strongly of tacos >_>
I'm also finding its probably going to be impossible to get my grades to go up.
I want to talk to my teachers about it, but I have the feeling I know what they'll say...

"Too bad"
"You should have seen me during sten"
"I wasn't teaching for that portion of the class"
etc. etc.

They'll come up with every excuse NOT to help me...
Thats what they always do.
Dude whatever.
I give the fuck up, its not like I'm going to get anywhere in life anyway.

Okay so...

My life officially sucks.
My dad was put back into the hospital because he wasn't taking his medicine, refused to eat and said he was going to kill himself.
My mom had to call the cops because thats why his psyche doctor told her to do, so I woke up and heard someone talking outside my house. I guess it was them. They took my dad and he was admitted back into the hospital.
The night before that he wouldn't leave my mom alone about the money we have, so she got fed up and my uncle had to come over to get him to shut up and go to sleep.
I ended up bawling my eyes out over the phone to my grandma because... I don't know. I just don't think I can really deal with this anymore
She said I needed to talk to people more because ever since this accident happened all I've been doing is pretending everything's okay, but its not. I don't want to put anymore stress on my mom and I just really don't feel like I have anyone to talk to. My friend in Virginia is one thing, but sometimes I just feel like I need a hug or something and no one's there to give it to me.
I don't really want to deal with people anymore. I just want to stay locked up in my room for the rest of my life or until this stage in my life passes, but its not an option.
Maybe I'll find some sort of outlet, but I don't really know where to go anymore.

Failure.

OKay so, a few posts back I posted some pictures that obviously didn't want to work.
Instead, I'll repost them but this time they'll be in sequence since August, when I started using the tablet.

I'm surprised how much I have actually developed over the past few months ._. All from tutorials and... yeah...

For the first time I used it I basically sucked. All I really did was sketches... oh, and I hardly knew how to use the thing lol.

I got onto doing more  detailed things and this is how they started to look. Still shitty, but whatever.

This is Ryohei. I started to draw him when I was like "HEY, LETS DO SOMETHING BIG WITH A TABLET." I seriously put everything off for like... two weeks until I finished this lol x_x

After I drew Ryohei I decided to better my skills and look up a shit ton of tutorials. This is Mizuki, and for a project in my class I had to try doing something I've never done before. So, I started to do some digital paintings failures. This was the first attempt after Ryohei. They'll all eventually be about a four page+ book of my characters and their information.

And finally, we have Dionysus. I actually kind of like how he turned out but I'm going to have to work on clothes. They look so awkward and not right har har har

Jesus

Sten
I feel like I should be something productive but I don't have to ._.

brb throwing up

I feel so gross
My nose is like "LOLSUCKSTOBEYOU"
and my stomach is like "With the slightest move, I will evacuate every ounce of food you have eaten in the last 24 hours."
And my throat is like "Drink something"
But I'm too lazy D;
I just woke up and my mom came downstairs to make sure I was still alive ._.

Wouldn't it be nice

Wouldn't it be nice if I could do what I am supposed to in Graphics?
Oh but I can't.
Wonderful.
Fucking, Wonderful.